Category Archives: Luls

!! !!! !!!!!!!


Eric: !

Me: !
I has a handsome hubby in my profile picture.
u jelly

Eric: !

Me: !
Let’s communicate via exclamation points.

Eric: i am handsome hubby


Eric: ! !!!! !! !!!! !!!

Me: I love to fuck you ?
! !!!! !! !! !!!!!! !! !!!

Eric: wow. You were so close.

Me: oh
want to fuck you

Eric: haha unbelievable

luls to the max

Okay so uh… so funny for people I haven’t talked to in a long time to go “Oh hey, sup? s’good?” And then I see their facebook relationship status, or they tell me, ‘oh yeah, single’ It’s like, ‘oh no, that’s not a coincidence AT ALL! I’m sure you’re not talking to me with expectations at all, douchenozzle’ Jesus. Lol. Maybe this is why I’ve dated online my whole life. So fucking stupid. And it’s not like I’m dumb. You’re not talking to me just to catch up, you’re talking to me because you think of me of a candidate for fuck buddy or more, who knows.

Oh to be single, how amusing.

Sorry guys, I’m married. My husband’s name is LoL. ROfl. <3 In other news, I had a pretty bad day. it wasn’t bad because of events that happened, it was bad because I felt mentally ill the whole time. I was just sad and/or depressed the whole fucking day. It sucked ass. Anyway, love you Emmie. Night bbygurrrll!

Because You Need a Laugh…

I changed her display name in case anyone who reads this knows her and gets up in her grill and shit like that. The internet never ceases to amaze me. I’ve actually never liked this person and I’m not sure why I’ve kept her on my friends list. But this is the stupidest/most entertaining thing you’ll read in a while. Yes, this actually happened to me. lol.

View your entire conversation history with this contact
Stupid Bitch said:
you play lol
Lyxie said:
. Stupid Bitch says:
*are yoyu there!
Lyxie says:
. Stupid Bitch says:
*i need the
*biggest favor
*ever :(
*i know we never talk i know i know but :(
*imin this.. relationship online and
*im not comfertable sending like “nudes” or anything yet :(
*so … i really just need sigh :(
*i need an I love (person) thing like photoshopped
*onto a girls booty or something >.< Lyxie says: *lol. . Stupid Bitch says: *and he wont ask me for anymore ever *IS there anyway :( you can help
*its not nude
Lyxie says:
*Yeah if you find me a picture you want me to use.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*i fking
*Love you..
*ummm >.< *sec *eww this is hard LOL *i dont feel like looking at naked girls :/ fml *ok im trying tofind 1 *thats uh *not naked ... LOL *and 1 thats not super complicated for you i guess to just put a little banner thingy :(
*but wait 1 question
*is there a way you can actually make the umm small banner saying
i love chubs
(actually look like its sitting on the bed)
Lyxie says:
*I don't understand.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*ok what i need to do is
*Get an (I love chubs) banner
*like a piece of paper
*but make it look like its actually part of the picture?
*>.< Lyxie says: *Can't I just write it in text? *Why does it need to be a piece of paper? . Stupid Bitch says: *no like i need him to actually think this "half naked girl" is me sort of :(
*I dont feel comfertable
*Sending my body :(
Lyxie says:
*Can I just tell you...
. Stupid Bitch says:
*so i found a girl with a simliar body >< Lyxie says: *This is about the stupidest thing I've ever heard of. . Stupid Bitch says: *lol i know *but he only wants 1 :(
Lyxie says:
*Showing him some other girl is the stupidest premise ever.
*If you're too prude, just buy him some porn.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*its not it
*i need him to tihnk its me cuz
*shes got a similira body :(
*but i cant take my own...
*cuz :( i cant
Lyxie says:
*This is retarded.
*I'm actually going to decline on doing this. It's too stupid.
*Sorry. It makes more sense to just take a picture of yourself.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*aww ok
*i get it :(
Lyxie says:
*If you're going to give him a fake picture just give him a fake pciture. No need to touch it up.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*its fine idk i just cant see myself taking pictures like htat :/
Lyxie says:
*So don't give him anything.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*ya but he wants "proof its me" thats the fking retarded sht
Lyxie says:
*It's a lie to give him something that's not you.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*true :/
Lyxie says:
*It's not retarded.
*That's what an internet relationship is; trust.
*Clearly you're not trustworthy if you're giving him a picture that isn't you.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*i am and im not
he has my number and everything
*the problem is i cant take like a.... picture in my underwear cuz
*I cant i dont feel comfertable
*but its fine thanks anyway
Lyxie says:
*So tell him that.
*Don't give him bullshit.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*idk its just
*hes so fking :(
*an ass
Lyxie says:
*So break up with him.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*probably should since hes tryin to make me do something im not comfertable with..
*but idk thought i fell for him :(
Lyxie says:
*Clearly not if you're trying to give him fake pictures of someone's ass.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*i did but its more like
*idk :( your right and your wrong
*like i know where your coming from and i really dont want him looking at anyone else
*but...... atthe same time i dont feel comfertable doing it
*i figured it was only 1 i could live with it :(
*but its ok i dont blame you at all
Lyxie says:
*So you say, "I'm not comfortable." And if he says, "come on baby" you say, "Fuck off, you can't respect me"
*It's so funny that you are even thinking of doing it. Like this is the biggest joke ever. Typical internet I guess.
*But good luck.
. Stupid Bitch says:
*thanks :/

#: 283

HA! A good post. :)

Anyway. So today was a spectacularly awesome day. It started with my new baby leopard gecko, which I don’t think I’ve mentioned, actually eating today. Eating while I was researching slurry so I could feed him/her a slurry mix. Anyway, so I knew today at work would be prettttyy awesome because people were planning to bring baked goods to practice! Hella awesome idea, whoever’s it was. Anyway. So I was really hyper and excited about cupcakes, AND THEN I got an e-mail with my test scores… it was pretty grim, 45% on test 5, and 55% on the final test. UGH. That’s devestating, but I knew it was going to happen… HOWEVA! I passed the friggin’ class, which is what counts!! So I was excited all practice because I passed my math class AND I was going to eat funfetti cupcakes, AND THEN I found out that Lauren brought  me the juice that I like. It was AWESOME.

Maybe I really should marry rich and just have a spoiled life.

Going to sleep!

#: 280

OMFG DUDE. I’M SO EXCITED! MIKE IS ALIVE! I don’t know how WELL he is, becasue his response was a total tease. I WANT A FRIGGIN’ COVERSATION, FAG. But anyway, I’m still excited that I even got a response… since he hasn’t acknowledged my existence in a long time.

#: 248

Soooo, when you know tomorrow is a snow day and you get to be home all day, what do you do?! Well I’ll tell you what I did, even though I felt like going to sleep the moment I woke up this morning at 8:15, I played the first tier of Guitar Hero IV on Medium. Not that I usually play on medium. But when you’re sleepy and had a long day, getting 98% is better than almost failing the songs (sometimes on Hard). It’s really quite liberating to be able to do what you want to do…

Anyway, the run down:
I took my Cezzie baby to a new vet today. I used to go to this place in Gaithersburg, which I wasn’t entirely comfortable with. But this place is good, this new place. (Even though I spent $150 :( ), It was interesting to see him handle her. The last vet (even though they were just doing a check up), they acted as though she was interesting and stuff. :s But this guy was really good, and I feel like I trust him. I felt bad for her most of the time though. He was squeezing her pretty hard. She was pissed off >: She has an infection and I noticed it from her eyes, but there’s also a problem in her mouth (he thinks it’s all related). He spent a good 2-5 minutes with moist q-tips, he was like.. gouging at her mouth. He kept showing me pus coming from her mouth. And I saw blood on the q-tips. It made me worried, but I hope she’ll get better with the medicine. I’m supposed to go back to them in 2 weeks. Eesh pets are expensive!

I didn’t get to say good night to Daniel. I was on my phone on MSN, because I was at a Ballet, and I think I was offline to him, but I was talking to Nick, so I guess I wasn’t offline to him. I guess hub just assumed I was offline cause of the ballet, and didn’t say good night :\! I hate those nights when we can’t say good night. Maybe it’s silly or foolish… but we have of our relationship, what we have, so let me alone.


sleepy alyx.

BTW, if you didn’t notice. IT’S SNOWING. No work tomorrow! :)

OvernightOvernight: Snow. Snow may be heavy at times. Additional snow accumulation of 4 to 6 inches. Lows in the mid 20s. Northeast winds 10 to 15 mph. Chance of snow near 100 percent.
SaturdaySaturday: Snow. Snow may be heavy at times. Additional snow accumulation of 8 to 12 inches. Highs around 30. North winds 15 to 20 mph with gusts up to 30 mph. Chance of snow near 100 percent.
Pasted from

#: 233

No, not the dog.

Okay, it’s story time. Once upon a time, I went over to my good friend, Christine’s apartment. When you’re in college, generally all of your friends talk about other friends that you don’t know. This always happens, and then when you finally meet said friend, it’s generally HILARIOUS.

So, anyway. I think it was last year during the Hockey play offs. I met Ashley. Ashley was one of those friends of a friend who always had stories about her. And she also was the new ‘it’s complicated, we’re almost dating’ situation with my best friend, Eric. Prior to him having Ashley to keep him company, we generally talked a lot and hung out a lot, and we even went camping in the middle of the winter. But once you get a significant other, you just can’t keep up with shit like that. But more so than that, he had a lot of problems with family right around that time, and just didn’t have time for friends.

But I digress. So I had my reservations about this girl, Ashley. I was concerned with how my best friend Eric would handle a girlfriend. And when I first met her, I also experienced Tina at the same time. So Ashley was diving into the Vodka bottle, and then we commenced to eating Tina’s penis shaped cookies. So anyway, I actually can’t remember the specific dialogue, which is really a shame, but from then until now, Ashley and I have experienced many adventures such as making a hand vagina while I was caffeinated.


Anyway, the reason why I’m so excited about Ashley all of a sudden is because I talked her into making a blog. For someone who will make a vagina with me, and will fill up a balloon with cum (conditioner or shampoo) and make a squirting vagina… you just know they’re going to write an awesome blog…

#: 222


[12:33:03] Daniel says:
I wish we were like 60
[12:33:07] Alyx says:
Me too.
[12:33:10] Alyx says:
Hellfire is more fun.
[12:33:15] Daniel says:
So it’d mean we would have grandkids
[12:33:20] Daniel says:
ha-ha, gotcha
[12:33:21] Daniel says:
[12:33:27] Alyx says:
We woul— HAHHA
[12:33:31] Alyx says:
[12:33:43] Daniel says:


[12:40:52] Alyx says:
[12:40:53] Daniel says:
[12:40:55] Alyx says:
I have the best man in the world.
[12:40:57] Alyx says:
[12:41:00] Daniel says:
[12:41:00] Alyx says:
I dun sharez.
[12:41:04] Alyx says:
[12:41:04] Alyx says:
[12:41:05] Alyx says:
[12:41:06] Alyx says:
[12:41:08] Daniel says:
[12:41:10] Alyx says:
[12:41:12] Alyx says:
omg yay.

#: 221

I like Lady Gaga.

I actually am fairly confident that if I had some reason to write a college paper about how Lady Gaga is amazing and genius, I would get an A on said paper.
I actually don’t feel like writing about it right now, because I kind of want to work on a layout for Emmie, but Lady Gaga kinda consumes me right now. Which is saying a lot from me because I am generally very sexist about vocals in music. 8/10 times I don’t like songs if females are singing it, but would like it if I male was singing it. Sometimes when girls are singing they just sound like whiney dying cats to me.

My job stresses me, as we all know. My brother and sister knitpick at me, my sister micromanages me, and I loathe it. I’m tired and I’m still only really eating one meal a day, perhaps a problem but I’m not addressing the situation. I also am finding myself too tangled up in things to do, to be able to start my exercise regimen. But wanting to be healthy really consumes me. I feel like I think about being healthier for various reasons 75% of my day. There are like sooo many reason that I want to be healthy and lose weight. It would benefit me in so many ways, it’s just very hard to change.

At night before I fall asleep, I have thoughts with ridiculous amounts of clarity, understanding, and usually epiphany. Last night I came to the conclusion that drugs, addiction, and rehab really kind of have a similar base for life and change. Most people are very comfortable with the day-to-day routine. Living life without change (for most people) is like a drug. Changing any behaviors that you’ve been doing for years is like getting yourself to stop doing drugs. Changing is like going through rehab. It’s ridiculously hard. I wish I had a good rehab program. The reason why this is, is because I over think everything, and I’ve watched/read things about people who are trying to kick one habit or another. There’s always the acknowelegement that the change is much better for you than the current. But it’s easier to be addicted, it’s easier to stick to what you’ve made regular, drugs, being fat, eating at these teams vs. those. Certain things are so hardwired that they’re like more hardcore addictions.

Being lazy is like… heroine to me. The heroine is so bad that it affects all aspects of my life, and even though I know it’s better for me to not be addicted to heroine, I just have to have it, I have to be lazy. Drinking soda is like weed to me. It’s something I feel like I can quit anytime (and it is usually pretty easy for me to quit drinking soda), but at the same time it’s eating away at certain things that are really important, irreversible damage. Weed does irreversible damage to brain cells, soda does irreversible damage to teeth. I could probably also write a paper about this particular subject. With a outline, I could have every aspect of my life lined up and compared and contrast to illegal drugs. :)


#: 008

Lol! wow, internet = funny. So my dad is on his laptop in the living room. and this is how it goes… :

Lyxicity: That’s pretty cool.
Lyxicity: You should try it out.
Dad, from the living room: *haha* Real cute, Alyx.
Me: Corey got me with that.
Dad: *laughs some more.* Oh, god. Should I send it to your mom? *hahaha*

And here is a seperate funny thing that just happened. On my MSN status I have
And I just got this:

Reality says (8:52 PM):
What the fuck :c
Alyx says (8:52 PM):
lol <3
Reality says (8:52 PM):
Alyx says (8:52 PM):
Cause it’s funny.
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
Reality says (8:53 PM):
Scared the fuck out of me ;-;
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
No kittie?
Reality says (8:53 PM):
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
Reality says (8:53 PM):
Asdf *clears history* ;-;
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
Alyx says (8:53 PM):
Reality says (8:53 PM):